Parenting is a paradox. On one hand, it is about nurturing — protecting, guiding, teaching, and loving with full presence. On the other hand, it is about letting go — allowing independence, making space for mistakes, and trusting children to grow into their own strength.
Most parents struggle because they hold too tightly to one side. Some over-nurture, shielding their children from pain, risk, or failure. Others let go too soon, confusing freedom with neglect. True parenting lies in the balance, and that balance is constantly shifting as a child grows.
I experienced this firsthand with my own upbringing. My family nurtured me with love, yet they never allowed me to stay dependent. When I fell, they expected me to rise. When I doubted, they expected me to try again. Their nurturing gave me security; their letting go gave me resilience.
Now, as a father, I feel that same tension every day. When my sons face challenges, my instinct is to protect them. But I remind myself: every struggle they face is training for life. Every failure is a lesson in resilience. Nurturing means being there with love; letting go means not taking the struggle away.
The hardest part is timing. Knowing when to step in and when to step back. But perhaps the truth is, there is no perfect timing. Parenting is imperfect, and children do not need perfection. They need presence, honesty, and courage — from both themselves and their parents.
To nurture is to plant roots. To let go is to give wings. Both are necessary. Without roots, a child feels lost. Without wings, a child feels trapped. The art of parenting is to give both — so that when they walk into the world, they carry stability and freedom together.